When I strode past Madame Tussauds in Amsterdam earlier this year, they were proudly displaying their effigy of David Beckham in the window display. From September, however, they will have some homegrown footballing talent to hawk to tourists with no desire to see any culture, in the form of Rafael van der Vaart.

Here’s his new waxwork, previewed in a flattering medieval-style-head-on-pike pose, together with a slightly less disturbing sculpture of his wife, Dutch Alpha Female Sylvie van der Vaart.

If you think they’re terrifying, imagine how the tourists who’ve sampled Amsterdam’s famous ‘plantlife’ are going to feel when they lock eyes with these things.

HT Kickette